Graduation Excitement or Anxiety ?

As a fifth year college student I can say that I am more than ready to graduate. Initially when I moved to Kent I was excited. I was living on my own in the dorms and I was finally getting into my major classes. I was so excited to be in the fashion program that I bought all the “required” textbooks brand new.

Required textbooks for my Fall 2013 classes

Things got interesting towards the end of my first semester on the main campus. I had dropped a drawing class because it just was not for me. My skill level was not up to par compared to everyone in the class and that’s when I decided to switch from Fashion Design to Fashion Merchandising. In doing this I believed I was completely done with the drawing aspect of fashion, I was wrong. I spent hours almost every week drawing fashion flats for my fashion visual class.

My fashion flats from 2013

As time passed my skill grew overall, not just with drawing flats. I was introduced to new software such as Adobe Photoshop and Illustrator. In Illustrator I created a lot of different patterns for various project in my Intro to Fashion Tech class.

Photoshop Tennis created with Monet

This is when I stared creating projects that I am still to this day very proud about it. Over these past three years I have done so many projects, mood boards and flats that I loved because it was something I never thought I could do. When I moved I lost a lot of my physical projects which is extremely upsetting

Croquis Project I created in Illustrator

When starting to write this blog I decided to go through old emails to find projects and anything else that would give me things to talk about. I found a paper in my email that I wrote for a college writing class back in 2011. After reading the paper it really got me thinking about life after graduation. I always get asked what I want to do or where I plan on working once I graduate and I never have a solid answer. In the paper that I found titled “Dreams” I was 100% sure of what I wanted to do. I had a plan set with friends and it seemed perfect at the time. Finding that paper reminded me that I need to really find one thing that I am very passionate about.

This is where the anxiety comes into play. I’m surrounded by my small group of friends who are all sure of what they want to do once they graduate. Then there’s me still going with the flow. I’m extremely excited to finally be done with school but at the same time my anxiety is at an all time high. Once I’m done I will constantly be asked by family members what my next move will be.

As for now my excitement is over powering my anxiety. I may not know for sure what job title I’m looking for but I know it is not in Ohio. Being from Canton you always here people talk about how they want out of the city but they never actually leave. I’m looking at my past for my inspiration for the future. At 17 years old I knew that giving up was not an option. I was set on a dream and I am determined to gain that mindset again. I may not have the answers right now but I still have time to figure it all out.